Coaching can be done in many ways. During personal coaching engagements I focus on the following key elements:
Results: If the client does not bring a specific question, the coaching session becomes a cosy affair, but ultimately the client takes no action. I use the initial sessions to sharpen and deepen the question or issue. Usually the issue is work related, but the behaviour that the client wants to change will often also affect his1 private situation. The question forms the basis for the sessions.
Ownership: The client must take ownership of what he wants change. This personal accountability for ones behaviour and the consequences is fundamental to the process of self-change. Without it we remain in our comfort zones. As long as the client holds the environment or circumstances responsible for his behaviour, there remain many reasons for not having to change. The client is responsible for his process!
Tip of the iceberg: In order to change his behaviour, the client has to examine his motives. His behaviour is only the tip of the iceberg, what is visible. The majority, however, is under water: the standards, values and themes that (un)consciously direct the client. Awareness of the whole of the iceberg makes changes in behaviour both structural and lasting.
Here and now: The behaviour that the client wants to change manifests not only in work and private situations, but also during the coaching sessions. This allows me the possibility of giving immediate feedback on his behaviour. This is a very powerful method for alerting the client and making him fully aware of how he acts as he does.
Systems Thinking: Interaction with the environment is discussed, as the client and his environment will have created an equilibrium (not always apparent) and his environment will counter-react when the client starts to behave in new ways. By helping the client to recognize this, we improve the likelihood that the changes will persist.